New beginnings are messy, but more often than not, worth it in the end.
As I tip-toe closer to :::GASP::: my 40’s…I can’t help but reflect on the seasons of life I have already lived through.
Each season so far has taught me a lot about myself. I have seen myself transform in a lot of ways: mentally, physically and socially. I have witnessed my soul grow brighter with each decision to be different than what I was expected to be. Over the years, I have celebrated my successes, but also bitched when I ultimately failed. Despite the hardships I have endured, I am pretty damn proud of how far I have come. Lately, I have started to really pay attention to who I am becoming, what I want out of life, and how I want to move forward.
As a mother, I have spent many seasons growing my family, and putting their needs first. I will always continue to do this, as I work hard to set my children up for success. There is nothing I would not do for them. Guiding them as they move forward towards adulthood. But I am also committing myself to other things, and embracing a new mindset on how I want my life to look. Acting on past dreams by pursuing a career in writing. Developing new habits such as daily workout routines, healthier eating habits, and attending church regularly. And most important of all, finding myself closer to God.
I want to grab hold of the self-confidence I need to be happy in my own skin, and not give a fuck what others think about me, or the choices I make in my life. It’s time for me to not only care for the people I love, but to start including MYSELF in those plans. You truly do only live once, and I hope I do not take my fresh start for granted.
I will start by not worrying about impressing other people. You either love me as I am, or you don’t. Sure, I am a bit weird. Awkward at times. Completely nerdy. But I love my quirks. It’s cool if you don’t, but don’ t put me down for them. Save your energy for your own life.
I will be 100% better about self-care. Whether it’s ”Kid-Free Nights”, making time for dinners with friends, or saying NO when I need to, by taking care of myself, life will make it more manageable to take care of my children too.
I will wholeheartedly embrace my squad. Even for an extreme introvert, I have managed to find myself with some incredible friendships. I am beyond lucky for the people God has chosen to put into my life, at just the right time. And the crazy part? After taking the time to get to know me, they choose to STAY. That kind of love is precious, and should be protected at all costs.
As I embark on a yet another new season in my life, I am battling a lot of feelings all at once: Fear, Anxiety, but also Excitement for what the future holds. I can do this...One day at a time. One step at a time. One minute at a time. One second at a time.
I. AM. GROOT.
♥️🦥✨
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